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A recovery journey through Peru

Updated: May 23, 2019







Living Room Cardiff member Katey Beggan has recently concluded a medical elective to Peru as part of her training to be a doctor. Katey learned early on in her recovery that becoming a risk taker and becoming a giver were at the heart of her journey. Here she speaks openly to the Silver Lining blog about her travels, experiences and the ups and downs of recovery on the road in an unfamiliar environment.


Q: Tell us a little bit about your South American journey. What took you there and what challenges did you face?


I started planning my trip to South America around a year before I went. The pinnacle of my course is the medical elective where students choose to study and learn medicine from anywhere in the world. I wanted to go to South America because it seemed like such a lively and culturally rich continent. I also spoke a little bit of Spanish and I wanted to improve my conversational Spanish.

I spent a month understanding healthcare in a government ran hospital with the infectious diseases team in Cusco, Peru. I saw diseases that are so rare over here. Parasites that live in the liver caught from the Amazon, lots of TB and awful contagious skin diseases. My experience here made me appreciate how fortunate we are to have the NHS. In Peru patients are actively encouraged to bribe doctors, people could be dying outside A&E but if they couldn’t provide papers doctors would refuse to treat them and psychiatric services were none existent. I was continually shocked by what I saw and it filled me with complete gratitude for our NHS.

Other challenges I faced were regarding my recovery. The idea that an adult chooses not to drink just because they don’t want to is so incomprehensible and confusing for South Americans. Recovery is hard to access as addiction isn’t seen as a problem never mind an illness.


Q: As a woman in recovery, what was it like finding support networks so far from home?


I found it very difficult. I tried attending meetings but I was turned away at the door because they were men only. I was told that the nearest female meeting was 8 hours one way! Then there was the issue of safety. Many meetings were in the evenings and it wasn't possible as a foreign female alcoholic to safely attend these meetings.

Alcohol is ingrained in their way of life and many spirits act as an anti bacterial after food. I obviously didn’t drink these spirits and subsequently contracted a serious parasite that made me very ill. My inner addict grew in reasons to drink so staying connected to my support network was vital. I called people frequently via WhatsApp, I emailed the Living Room, I messaged someone in recovery every day and I listened to recovery shares and music on YouTube. I also implemented meditation and journaling as a way to get my thoughts out of my head in order to try and make sure that they don’t spiral.





Q: What did you read on your journey that gave you inspiration?


I read extracts from the Big Book of AA and the 12 in 12 book. I also read a biographical book called ‘This is going to hurt’. It is the chronicles of a junior doctor. It was very grounding and allowed me to understand more about the career I’m about to go into. It also gave me a space to relate to his emotions and struggles and therefore for me to explore where I was at.


Q: How did the isolation affect your recovery, what strengths did you draw on to stay safe?


The isolation was very hard! There were several times I wanted to talk through certain situations with someone in recovery but the time difference combined with a lack of privacy made this very hard! I never felt alone as there was a constant feeling of my higher power being present but I did feel that I wanted some physical contact with people from the recovery community.


I left voicemails and verbal messages on WhatsApp. That was helpful as I was got my thoughts out and spoke my truth. It helped to de-clutter my brain despite having no one to reply. I also took up a fun past time that was neglected in active addiction. I started to write poetry again and I started with writing a poem on my experience , strength and hope in recovery. This kept me focused on my recovery and reminded me of the destructive nature of my drinking in case the addict thoughts decided to convince me otherwise.


Q: What have you learned about yourself along the way?


I have learnt that my recovery is so much stronger than I first thought, however I have to be mindful that I don’t get complacent. I faced extreme challenges to my sobriety where it would have been far easier to drink than to stay sober. I was travelling with a person who was a very heavy drinker, people refused to give me water instead of wine for evening meals and people telling me that a small sip won’t harm.

I think I’ve learnt that all the hard work I put into recovery in the first 2 years really has given me a strong foundation to live my life. I have learnt that I now trust myself. This is huge as my trust has been broken in so many different ways in past and for me to trust my thoughts and my actions in order to keep me safe is a huge change in my mentality and way of living.

I also learnt that I really struggle to be in environments where I can’t express my emotions and thought processes for long periods of time. I now know that this is a non negotiable boundary going forward that is essential for keeping me sober. Without this I turn all the emotions inwards and my mental health and clarity of thought suffers.


Q: What have you learned about recovery?


Being an alcoholic/addict in Europe is amazing. I have the ability to access services that understand addiction and help me on my recovery road. I am not labelled or given unhealthy advice. I have a community of people with several support groups a day to access as a female.

I can access mixed sex recovery groups. This has given me so much healing and has changed my opinion of men. Hearing men speak of why they get angry and then cry has allowed me to express compassion about people who have hurt me in the past. As the addiction meetings in South America are single sex only I would not have had the opportunity for this healing to take place.

Finally I have learnt that addiction hides in shame. Many people don’t regard themselves as having an addiction in South America because nobody talks about it. In their eyes if they don’t talk about it, it’s not an issue. Being an alcoholic is one of the worst people you can be and brings huge shame and disgrace on you and your family. I believe that these closed mindsets fuel addiction and let it thrive. It makes me see the importance of the steps and of living honesty in my recovery.

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